Are you one of my three regular readers? If so, you might remember that in my last post entitled “Life is hard” I listed some chores/activities/projects that I needed to get done. Ten days later and none of those things have been completed. I will tell you what HAS been completed: Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Well, couch sitting, fast food eating, and drinking beer have been completed, but those aren’t really good, sound accomplishments.
I excel at procrastination. I’ve spent several years honing my craft. I would call my high school and college years The Golden Years of procrastination for me. That’s when I realized I could skate by for nearly the whole semester before I had to do any work and still pull mostly As and Bs (At least in my best subjects. Math? Not so much.).
Now, as a home-owning adult, I’m supposed to be getting all sorts of things done before the weather takes a turn for the snowy and yet, I continue to get nothing done. I’m also supposed to be writing in this damn blog twice a week. Uh…right. Apparently yesterday was National Writing Day or some sort of thing. Once I heard that news, I was like, “That’s it! I will go home and immediately start writing something and it will be awesome!” This is what happened after I got home: I put on my pjs, sat my ass on the couch, ate a Wendy’s #6 (that’s the spicy chicken combo meal in case you were wondering), pet my cat, looked at monster.com (had a rough day at the office) but then couldn’t figure out what the hell kind of new job I want, then spent the rest of the night obsessively checking Facebook every five minutes while watching DVRed sitcoms. Time waster and procrastinator extraordinaire!
“But wait, Miss Tee,” you say, “You are writing in your blog now! That’s great!” WRONG. Guess where I am? I’m at work, procrastinating what I’m supposed to be doing! I am so good at procrastinating that I should get paid to procrastinate! Wait, isn’t that kind of what’s happening right now? Ha ha! I’ve won!